Drop Funnel

Let me paint you a picture. It’s 2:37am. I’m sitting in a Denny’s parking lot, coffee cold, trying to update a client’s pipeline on this godforsaken app. The spinner won’t stop spinning. My thumb is cramping. I’m this close to chucking my iPhone into the waffle house dumpster.

Six months later? That same app just helped me close a $12k deal while I was waiting for my kid’s soccer practice to end.

Here’s the no-BS survival guide I wish I’d had.

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The Absolute Worst Parts (Prepare Yourself)

1. Pipeline Management is Like Herding Cats

• That satisfying drag-and-drop you love on desktop?
• On mobile it’s like trying to thread a needle during an earthquake
• What finally worked: The tiny “…” menu → “Move stage” → deep breath

2. The Mysterious Disappearing Buttons

• One minute you’re replying to a lead
• Next minute the send button ghosts you
• My ghetto fix: Swipe close the app, reopen, sacrifice a pen to the tech gods

3. The Loading Screen of Damnation

• “Just checking for updates…” for 47 minutes
• Nuclear option: Uninstall, reinstall, cry a little

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What Actually Saves My Ass Daily

1. Lead Alerts That Slap You Awake

• Not some wimpy little “ding”
• Your phone vibrates like it’s possessed
• Shows you:
  • Who they are
  • Where they came from
  • Last thing you talked about
• Can call/text right from the alert (before you forget)

Pro tip: Go into settings and mute the tire-kickers so you only get alerts for hot leads

2. Client Info in Your Pocket
Real life example from yesterday:

• Client calls: “What was that number we discussed?”
• Me (while walking dog):
  1. Open app
  2. Search name
  3. See full history (calls, texts, invoices)
  4. Sound like a wizard who remembers everything

3. SMS That Doesn’t Look Like You’re 12

• Clean threads (unlike some cough Zoho cough)
• Saved responses for when you’re busy:
  • “Got this! Reply coming by 5pm”
  • “Checking now and will circle back”
• Attachments that usually work (unless Mercury is in retrograde)

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Secret Hacks I Learned the Hard Way

1. Voice Notes for Goldfish Brains

• Right after a client call:
  1. Hit the mic button
  2. Ramble: “Said they’d decide by Thursday, hates phone calls, daughter plays soccer”
  3. Saves directly to their profile
• Lifesaver when you’re driving/peeing/drunk

2. The Fake Offline Mode

• Shows your recent contacts when you have no service
• Can’t edit but at least you’re not completely screwed

3. Camera Trick for Paper Dinosaurs

• Snap pics of:
  • Business cards (who still has these?)
  • Signed contracts
  • Receipts
• Automatically files them under the right client
• Makes you look organized (even if your car looks like a tornado hit it)

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Who Should Even Bother?

✔️ Road warriors (realtors, contractors, anyone who works in actual buildings)
✔️ Agency owners who are always between coffee meetings
✔️ Parents who work from the soccer field sidelines

Don’t bother if:
✖ You think “mobile” is just for Instagram
✖ Your idea of fieldwork is walking to the fridge
✖ You have anger management issues

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How I Stopped Hating It

1. Lowered my expectations – it’s a sidekick, not the hero
2. Customized notifications – only get alerts for $$$ leads
3. Embraced the jank – no app is perfect, this one gets you by

Pro move: Do heavy lifting on desktop, use mobile for quick checks and emergencies

Want to see exactly how I have mine set up? Reply “SHOW ME” and I’ll send you real screenshots from my actual phone – spaghetti stains and all.

• Martin

PS: The first time you reply to a client email from the toilet, you’ll understand why this janky app is worth keeping around.

PPS: If your current CRM’s mobile app makes this one look good… yikes. My condolences. Been there.